Are you one of those people who have a hard time loving yourself? If so, you are not alone. Loving yourself is an ongoing journey. It takes practice.
Are you one of those people who have a hard time loving yourself? If so, you are not alone. Loving yourself is an ongoing journey. It takes practice. You can do it! Here are some tips for you to practice self love.
1. Practice receiving love
To truly love is to be able to receive it. When someone loves you, does some kind deeds to you, say kind words, give you gifts, or give you compliments, embrace it. Allow yourself to feel the love that has come your way. Know that you are worthy of love. It is important to accept a gift of love by others. You give yourself a chance to learn more about yourself that you are lovable. You give someone a joy of giving by loving you. Another important way is to practice receiving love by saying “I love you” to yourself. Let that love fill your heart. Receive that love that you give to yourself unconditionally.
2. Practice saying “no”
It is o.k. to say “no” to people when you do not feel like doing something. Do not feel guilty about it. Just realize that you have the right to do so. This is different from doing things out of love. If you do things out of love and your heart wants to do them, that is a different story. What I am talking about here is when your heart does not want to do it and you feel like you have to please someone, and make others happy by over extending yourself. Learning how to say “no” is an art. It takes practice. You might say “Thank you for asking. I am not ready to commit to doing anything right now.” You cannot please everyone. When you say “no”, remember to smile sincerely and say “no” gracefully.
3. Do what you love
What do you love to do? If you could find something that you love to do and spend time doing it, you will experience love, joy, and happiness in your heart. That is when you truly connect with your authentic self. As a result you become happier and more loving.
4. Treat yourself like treating your very best friend
How do you treat your very best friend? Do you treat him/her with love, kindness, trust, appreciation, acceptance, and respect? If you can give that to your friend, why don’t you give that to yourself? Practice treating yourself like you treat your very best friend by saying kind words to yourself. Stop calling yourself names. Stop beating yourself up. Forgive yourself. Give yourself compliments. Know your boundaries and listen deeply to your needs. Treat yourself kindly, gently, and lovingly like you treat your very best friend.
Forgive yourself for all the mistakes, regrets, shames, and everything. Leave the past behind and be present with your new day. Today is your day. It is time to move forward. Just do it.
6. Nurture yourself
Self care is very important. Set up some time to be by yourself, just by yourself. Do something that gives you peace, love, and joy with yourself. You can nurture yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
- Go to a gym, yoga class, take a walk, play tennis, or any kind of exercise that you love to do
- Go to a dance class if you love to dance
- Take a nap when you want and need to
- Get a massage
- Consume healthy food that is good for your body.
Realize that you do this because you love you. Take very good care of you. If you don’t, who will?
- Feel good about yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror, smile, and say “I love you. I am love, loving, and lovable.”
- Listen to your favorite music
- Acknowledge your accomplishment each day even it is a small thing
- Look at the sunrise each morning
- Pet your dog or cat
- Water your plants
- Call or e-mail your friends and share your feelings with them
- Wear your favorite clothes
- Do whatever makes you feel good about yourself
- Read your favorite books
- Write your daily journal about dreams
- Write your to do list
- Write your gratitude list
- Make a list of your short and long term goals
- Track your goals
- Make a list of things that you want to improve about your life, love, and relationships
- Meditate or contemplate
- Be centered with your higher self
- Connect with nature
7. Stop comparing yourself to others
Everyone on this earth is unique. We all have different gifts. When you compare yourself to others, it makes you feel bad about yourself. When you compare yourself to others for what they have, whether it is a car, a house, a mate, children, money, or a job, it makes you feel low self esteem, lose your confidence, and perhaps depressed, envy or jealous. A way to stop comparing yourself to others is by focusing on your own strength. Get to know yourself and discover what is your greatest gift that you are meant to share with the world.
Another great way is by practicing gratitude. Be happy for what you have. Really be grateful about everything that you have; people in your life, job, relationships, material, etc. Gratitude keeps your heart open to love. No one is quite like you. Just be you. Be grateful for being the wonderful you. Do the best you can. Be the best you can and love yourself more. Then, you have more love to give to others.
8. Stop trying to be perfect
Here is a quote from a dear friend of mine: “Excellence I can achieve. Perfection is God’s business”. Stop criticizing yourself for being less than perfect. Always do your best. But, not reaching perfection is not failure.
9. Change your self talk
“Change your Self-Talk and you will change your programs. Change your programs and you will change your life.”
~Dr. Shad Helmstetter
Have you ever watched your thoughts on how you talk to yourself? Is it negative or positive? If you have been talking to yourself negatively, you can change it by changing your programs. You can change your self-talk by changing your programs that have been stored in your brain since you were born. A great way that I would recommend is to listen to self-talk cds. It works for many people. It worked for me and it changed my life in an amazing, profound, and incredible way.
When you love yourself, you have more love to give. You become more attractive. As a result, you attract more love into your life when you are love, loving, and lovable.