Loving loved ones is not forbidden, but is it fair if common sense is blinded by the heart? The reason is, not a few people are willing to do everythi
Loving loved ones is not forbidden, but is it fair if common sense is blinded by the heart? The reason is, not a few people are willing to do everything for their soul mate, aka blind love, thus closing their eyes from the bad attitude of their partner. In popular terms, this sometimes logical love is called blind love or “simp” or the slave of love. What is the cause?
Why is there anyone who can blindly love their partner?
There is an old saying that love is blind. This means that you feel so much in love with your partner that you are willing to do anything for him, regardless of yourself.
You may even be inclined to subconsciously reject the fact that your partner has traits, attitudes, characteristics, or habits that are usually seen as flaws. When someone feels hurt or object to your partner’s “dark side”, you tend to brush it off and don’t see it as a mistake or a deficiency.
Blind love makes you feel that what you do and show to your partner is normal, but people generally find it excessive, unrealistic, and prone to obsessiveness.
A study from the University College of London published in the journal Neuro Image in 2004 suspects that it stems from the way the brain defines love or affection.
Feelings of love in general stimulate parts of the brain called the amygdala and nucleus accumbens to bring out feelings of inner satisfaction and sensations of euphoria. Euphoria itself is an exaggerated feeling of joy.
The brain defines love for a partner in the same way that a mother loves a child
This study concluded that feelings of love stimulate the brain to build a strong emotional bond between two humans by increasing feelings of joy and happiness. However, the feeling of love inactivates the part of the brain that is used to reason logic, weighs risk and evil, and generates negative emotions.
Uniquely, researchers found that the brain defines romantic love between two people as equal to instinctive love and the emotional bond between mother and child.
Therefore, the effect of blind love with love between mother and child can at first glance look the same. Together, it makes it difficult for us to see the shortcomings or badness of a loved one.
It is like this: even though a mother has a stubborn child, she can still tolerate, forgive, and love her child forever. Likewise with people who blindly love their partner.
That’s why when a partner acts repeatedly, that person can tolerate it in the name of love. Because basically, the principles of romantic love and maternal love are very important factors for the survival of the species.
So in conclusion, love makes us sometimes unable to reason. Meanwhile, the stimulation of love makes one part of the brain produce an excessive sense of happiness, the part of the brain that is responsible for the process of reasoning and reality is weakened or “turned off”. As a result, love will blind you from all the behaviors, mistakes, and ugliness of your loved one.
Blind love can make you cover up your partner’s weaknesses
Feelings of love help you build positive impressions and views of your partner. This is often called positive delusion bias. In some cases, a positive attitude towards a partner can make the relationship last. But badly, this biased response also tends to make you always cover up your partner’s shortcomings so that the relationship becomes unhealthy.
For example like this, your partner has actually been showing signs of infidelity for a long time. Other people who are not in love with him or her can smell this strange gesture, but generally not for you.
The reason is, your brain has a positive illusion about your partner, so you will tend to dismiss this fact as a misunderstanding or just ignore the signs. You may also find him a good partner character.
To make matters worse, a partner shows abusive or violent traits. Blind love often disguises negatives into positives, so that later it will be difficult for you to get out of the fantasies you have built about your partner.
This is what you have to train yourself sometimes. Even though it is love, you still have to be able to see the real flaws and truths in your partner or other people.